A Princess Epiphany

This weekend I remembered that I’m actually a beautiful princess inside that loves to laugh, play, be goofy and loves everyone and wants to help people see the beautiful, happy, loving amazing person they really are inside.

I realized that for a very, very long time I’ve been hiding and trying to be strong and protect myself from being hurt because of all the times I’ve been hurt in my life. I learned that I don’t have to keep trying to be strong and unemotional and perfectionistic and that I don’t have to try to please everyone else in order to feel worthy of love, respect, safety and significance. I don’t have to feel insecure, guilty and weak because I didn’t know how to prevent the pains in my past; maybe they were perfectly a part of my life so that I would someday learn to really love myself as I truly am and break free of all the patterns of behavior that were holding me back from being vulnerable and sharing myself with others. Maybe everything I’ve experienced and lived through was so that I would be able to develop a strength and then accept and embrace my vulnerability so I could reach out and help others the way I’ve always wanted to in a way that is meaningful to me and fills me with passion.

It makes me so happy when people move past their suffering and see how wonderful they really are and how meaningful and amazing it is when they share themselves with others and this weekend I learned how amazing it is to experience that in oneself. We don’t have to change to be the way we think we should or have to be, we just have to be and love who we really are and then share ourselves and our unique gifts with others. If I’d only known then what I know right now, life would have been very different, but then of course, I wouldn’t be exactly who I am right this moment and I’m happy to say that it feels pretty damn good to be a princess that just put on a tiara and jumped on her unmade bed after being completely vulnerable and sharing some of her deepest hurts and feelings with her sister. I felt great and free and happy, I felt playful and new.  

Sometimes life hurts and sometimes we get stuck and feel helpless, unable to make progress or to see how anything can get better in our lives or that we won’t be able to accomplish the things we really would like to, sometimes we don’t even realize what the problem is or what’s really preventing us from being the way we want to be…and then sometimes we reach a moment where we gain a new understanding of ourselves and the things we’ve experienced in our lives and suddenly we’re able to move forward. Maybe you’ve had a friend or mentor along the way that that took the time to care about you and guide you, asking for nothing in return. Maybe you’re a fan of personal development and coaching like I am and you’ve gained insights that helped you when you least expected it. Maybe you’ve been an observer of life and have seen enough examples of something better that you figured out a way to move toward it. Maybe you’re still suffering and hurting and haven’t found that something to become your tipping point toward your happiness or embracing your wonderful self and you’re looking for answers when you’re not even sure of the right questions.

For me, learning about coaching because of my desire to really help other people figure out what makes them happy and what they want and then get the tools and make the plan to take action and move toward that has touched me far more than I thought it would. I have ventured down many paths, following my curiosity to explore education and counseling and different areas in psychology and medicine and coaching and round about again getting more and more clear about the way I wanted to help other people and in that process, along with the events of my life I arrived at today. I believe in the power of coaching, I know it works, even self-coaching works though I think it’s a much slower process. I believe and know it works because everything I’ve learned about coaching and the examples and trainings that I’ve done my best to learn with the hopes of being able to help others began helping me in ways I didn’t realize I needed. I know I still have so much more to learn and it might take some time to really get used to being myself without fear but I’ve tasted it, I’ve felt it and there’s no way I’m going back to the way things were before.

My prayer for you is that you will take the time to dig deep and remember who you really are, especially at your most joyful (even if the last time you were truly free and happy was as a small child before the world and the things you couldn’t control or didn’t know how to deal with began hurting you or making you think less of yourself) and that you’ll be able to know that you are amazing person, that you are truly unique and that God doesn’t make mistakes; He absolutely loves you and you are a part of something far greater than yourself and you have wonderful gifts to share with the world.

*If you are curious about coaching and the different areas of personal development that I’ve been researching I recommend reviewing the materials from Anthony Robbins, Cloe Madanes, Jack Canfield, Human Needs Psychology, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Neuro-Associative Conditioning, Self-Coaching and any related areas. There’s an abundance of information out there for anyone taking the time to look for it. May you find exactly what you need. ❤

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